Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Did I show you my penis last night?
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
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