I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
