OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Randomize