Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
