Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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