Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
