Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Randomize
