i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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