You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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