i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
