I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
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