Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Randomize
