But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
