brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Randomize
