the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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