just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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