Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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