Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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