i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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