just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
