I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
So much Jack, so little girl.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
