ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Randomize
