There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
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