I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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