i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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