How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize