She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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