3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Randomize
