When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
I wish there were birth control emojis
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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