I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
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