On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
this beer tastes like vomit already
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
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