You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
My vagina just clenched in fear
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
