that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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