PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
