Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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