Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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