he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize
