wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
I smell like Dick and happiness
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