That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
