Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
