Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
i just had sex bonerless
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize