Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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