Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Randomize
