I molested 6 butterflies tonight
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
