She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Randomize
