Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
