I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
Randomize
