Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
