As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize
