did you get engaged???
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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