this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
